Mum & Smithy - Their Views of Me

Smithy is my best-mate, and future best-man of my future wedding. Mum is ... mum!

Here are two conversation screenshots about me.

Mum:

"I just cruised!"

Sounds about right. I just enjoyed school, I never wanted to associate myself with feelings of stress or compete with others too much. I was totally content cruising. To others this may be seen as wasted potential, but personally I see this as an attempt to make life easy for myself, and remain as happy as possible, with my grades remaining a concern only for myself and for no-one else to worry about.

Now for Smithy's significantly longer paragraph on his depiction of me:

(*sniff sniff* That was beautiful mate, thank you for the kind words. For those who don't know, BN is my nickname to those who knew me throughout my BA (Hons) Uni days!)

Smithy talks in the second part of the paragraph about my commitment and drive in life, which is funny because I guess I don't ever see myself as committed or driven when thinking of design processes and projects, but in terms of my life and to be happy in it (specifically in relation to my fiancée) I am a committed man. I am the first of all my close group of friends to be engaged and thinking of marriage. This incidentally coincides with my past feelings of only caring about a happy life, and not concerning things such as grades or stress as part of that.

His belief in my abilities, along with my fiancée's and family's belief in me is often forgotten in my head, and lost within foggy thoughts of self-doubt and low self-esteem.

How can I find a way to clear the fog and realise that my own averageness shouldn't be seen as a hinderance, but is in fact a strong suit of mine and should be celebrated as unique?